Thursday, June 30, 2011

Chicago, here I am!

I am in Chicago to attend a wedding.
When we were informed of this wedding last summer, I was at the beginning of my journey to fight against cancer. I was wondering what condition I would be in. I was not sure if I would be able to go. Since then I learned that it was God's will for me to be healed, I was to keep believing the word of God, I was to know the word of God so that faith would come, and I believed.  There is no proof that the cancer is gone yet but I keep believing.

And I am in Chicago. It is amazing. I took 2 days off from work!

I was a little nervous to travel. I am physically fine, so there is no reason to be afraid, but I was a little nervous. Then I saw 2 feathers today. They suddenly came to my sight in the air. I had fun experiences with feathers in the past, so they remind me of God's encouragement. I smiled when I saw them. God is with me. God is so gracious!

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Power of God to face Monday

I received God's power to face Monday after I attended the conference with Graham Cooke and Christa Black! My shoulder is getting healed. I can tell that it is getting better all of a sudden (yet gradually).
My shoulder injury seems to be related to how I feel about the office. It was getting negative. But God's ways are always right. Overcoming evil with good is the right path. Now I am taking one more step forward towards more freedom. I used to start feeling nervous on Sunday afternoon thinking about the pressure at work, even though I like the job, but this Sunday was different.  I choose not to follow the path of how I feel. Black Monday cannot get me now.


Saturday, June 18, 2011

Faith revived with David Wilkrson's last message

The MRI result showed that I had adhesive capsulitis, bursitis, and tendinopathy.
I have been praying for my right shoulder but it is painful. I have a lot of stress at work, too. I am being negative. Lord, what should I do about my shoulder? I wake up in the middle of the night, weeping due to the stress from work. The shoulder pain does not help.

I was at the oncologist's office again, receiving the maintenance medication last Thursday. I was feeling very worn out. I was asking myself where the joy of the LORD was. I didn't have it. I was shocked. I reached to the newsletter in my purse. I was desperately trying to find the LORD's way again, then suddenly it came. 

Mr. David Wilkerson

Why do I forget that God' specialty is to give us hope when there seems to be no hope.

仕事がヘビーで超スピードでタイプをうちまくっていたら肩が1月あたりから痛くなり、そのうち直るだろうと思っていたら腕があがらなくなってしまいました。癌が見つかった肺と近いので主治医にそうだんしたら、MRIをオーダーしてくれました。で、結局四十肩とか五十肩とかいうものなのだとおもいます。(ちゃんと調べてない) 祈っていたし、人にも祈ってもらってるけれど同じ感じでした。MRIのあたりからなんか直ってきたみたいだけど、今度はますます腕があがらなくなってます。主よ、どうしましょう。。。と祈りながら、悲しんでいきました。仕事のストレスもすごくて(なんか意地悪されてるみたいに思えた)先週は夜中に急に目がさめて大なきをしてました。仕事のことを考えて。いままでの主からの喜びはどこへ行ったのかと、自分でも驚きです。どこにもない!!でも一生懸命探したら、答えがやってきました。先週のアポイントメントのときにDavid Wilkersonさんの最後のDevotional をよんでたら、どーんと来ました。主以外に希望はない!! しってるはずなのに、突然新しい出来事のように私に教えてくれた言葉。これこそ生きた神様のメッセージだと思いました。そして受け取りました。 イエス様、ありがとうございます。

Saturday, June 4, 2011

Dreams I had during chemo

First dream

I started to run away from a place that looked like a death house. I wrote about it somewhere in this blog.  It was right before the first chemo therapy.

Second dream

My husband was having me listen to some messages from The Bethel church in Redding, California. One of them was about a girl who can get a new body part for the person she is praying for. Then one night I had a dream. I was standing and looking up at the light blue sky with some clouds. I didn't know where it was. Then suddenly 2 right lungs came down and stopped in the middle of the air. (The cancer had been identified in my right lung.)  I could feel someone was standing next to me. After I stared at those two lungs for a short while, I said, "What am I doing? I need to grab the good lung!" (One was good, and the other was a bad lung.) I reached for the good lung, and I woke up.

Third dream

I was standing at a festival or something. Booths are there, and suddenly I was standing in front of a small table where a man was performing some kind of card magic. He moved his hands fast and something was done, but I didn't know what he did. Then the man said to me, "Didn't you get it? It means your liver is clear."

Some weeks later I received good news from the radiologist. The liver, lymph, and the bones were clear, and the size of the tumor decreased.

Benny Hinn

I decided to watch Benny Hinn one evening because I wanted to see some people healed and be encouraged. Have you heard of anyone placing hands on the screen with those TV evangelists and people are saved? I have. I thought I would try. (I know some people would laugh at me but I just thought I would try.) I knelt in front of the TV screen, placed my hands on the screen over Benny Hinns. He says, "Hmmm...Someone is healed from Lung cancer..."  Then he went on to say the person's name, and it was not mine. But you know what! This year I learned that I can received the crumbs that come off of the table, too. Immediately I said to myself , "I would take it!"  Through Benny Hinn or through Presbyterian's and Lutheran's faithful prayers, God can heal.

Yet another dream

I am still new to the church I attend. They are praying that more healing will happen at the church. They want to love God and love people. One of the pastors had said that he has not seen anyone healed after he prayed for them. He wants to see healing right in front of his eyes. I do, too. I appreciated his honesty. One Sunday morning I was wondering if I am going to that church or not (because my family goes somewhere else), then suddenly the pastor's serious face appeared right in front of me while I was asleep. I felt like maybe I was supposed to ask him to pray for me. I felt like it was God's way - using someone who said none had been healed after he prayed. God is full of grace! When I stood in front of him, he immediately said, "I had been looking for you." I knew I did the right thing that morning.